You said – ”I'm glad I was late getting here. I was almost going to get myself drawn into the conversation.”

You said – ”If the woman only punctures a womb and lives, daddy has one testicle removed in the SAME manner. If she and fetus bleed to death, he must have both testicles identically removed and bleed to death.”

….and – ”Men always get a little nervous when the “family jewels” are at risk.”

These comments sound like the ludicrously old-fashioned utterances of the bearded dykes (not that you are) of thirty years ago, who set back the cause of sexual equality for fifty years by alienating the reasonable and moderate majority of society.

Thankfully, today’s society has reached a point where, by and large, men and women have the same opportunities – now that the playing field is more level, a woman’s destiny is largely in her own hands.

You said – ”I spoke to the river in the Name of Jesus, and commanded it to return into its banks immediately…..since that time I have re-routed other damaging storms away from my area….”

And what about the poor bastards who bore the brunt of the storm that you magically deflected away from your neighbourhood?

Perhaps we should refer to you now as Chris “Moses” Kinsinger, following your storm-deflecting feat. You know, it’s quite funny really, because outside of the bible, there is practically no evidence to support the idea that Moses ever existed. Indeed, there’s very little physical archaeological evidence that the Exodus ever took place, which does tend to somewhat invalidate what the bible has to say – if it’s wrong about the Exodus, why should anyone believe the rest of its fanciful fiction?

The whole story of the Hebrews’ time in Egypt (about 1200 years before Christ) is fraught with ambiguity – it is not certain that they were ever there to begin with.

However, let’s suspend disbelief for a brief moment, and assume they were. The bible talks about the ten plagues that God inflicted upon pharaoh, and then the Hebrews’ exit from Egypt with Moses parting the Red Sea and then the waves crashing down on pharaoh’s pursuing charioteers.

Let us now explode each one of these myths. At about the time of the ‘plagues’ there was an enormous volcanic eruption that virtually destroyed a Greek island 800 kilometres to the north-west of Egypt. This volcanic activity spewed enormous amounts of dust into the atmosphere, the skies darkened for three days. The rest of the ‘plagues’ are explained by the various effects that the volcanic eruption had on the behaviour of the weather and the animal kingdom.

When Moses finally upped sticks, he didn’t arrive at the Red Sea – that was a misinterpretation that the translators of the bible made. No, it wasn’t the Red Sea, it was a ‘sea of reeds’, an area of water (long since dried up) to the east of the Nile delta. This shallow and silted area of water would still have been awkward to cross – but was like a puddle compared to the expanse of the Red Sea. Anyway, owing to further volcanic activity at the time, an enormous tidal wave was caused (much like the one that will destroy the eastern seaboard of the United States at some time in the future, owing to the imminent collapse of an island off the north-west coast of Africa). As the tidal wave approached Egypt, much of the coastal waters would have rapidly receded as the tidal wave sucked in everything before it. This would have provided ample time for the fleeing Hebrews to cross the temporarily dried-up ‘sea of reeds’. Of course, by the time the pursuing Egyptians had begun their crossing, the fifty foot tidal wave had arrived.

As far the communication of the ten commandments is concerned, a natural phenomena can also explain that – mankind’s imagination.

I’m not sure I like your idea of religion, Chris – it sounds more like witchcraft to me.

And anyway, I bet you weren’t the only one praying to his God to avert the impending storm – or do you have the monopoly on God’s attention?

What about Charlie Smith, the guy who lives a couple miles to the east of your home who also prayed for the storm to pass by his home? Okay, so with the weight of yours and Charlie’s prayers, perhaps the storm would move westward onto the home of someone else.

But what about Alfie Jones, who lives a couple of miles to the west of your home who also prayed for the storm to pass by his home? Okay, so with the weight of yours, Charlie’s and Alfie’s prayers, perhaps the storm would move northward onto the home of someone else.

But what about Teddy Brown, who lives a couple of miles to the north of your home who also prayed for the storm to pass by his home? Okay, so with the weight of yours, Charlie’s, Alfie’s and Teddy’s prayers, perhaps the storm would move southward onto the home of someone else.

But what about Johnny Edwards, who lives a couple of miles to the south of your home who also prayed for the storm to pass by his home?

Where does the storm go now? Does it just disappear in the blink of an eye thanks to God’s intervention? Of course, such a meteorological event has never been recorded….and is never likely to be.

What about all of the animals who are incapable of prayer you have condemned to a watery grave by deflecting the storm past your house? What have they done to upset your Master?

!sdrawkcab gniklat yrt s'tel :aedi na evah I

quote:

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Originally posted by Pete M:
You keep away with your Fish Chips you, or I'll .. I'll ... I'll set Britney Spears on you!!!

He he he.

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Only in your mind, Daniel.

I am well aware that there are numerous like-minded believers in my area. I know that I am not alone, and that Charlie & I, along with many others...moved that storm. We successfully caused it to do no harm. Period.

My faith does indeed move the hand of God. That is not an arrogant statement. It is the realization of true humility. All I do is obey His Word. He provides the power, and He does the impossible. EACH AND EVERY ONE OF US is born with "a measure of faith". If we choose to exercise it, we can achieve Arnold Swartzenegger status...if not...(?).

I pray for sick people, and my God heals themALL!
Please explain how that can be defined as "mass destruction", won't you?

Your "education" may have excited your mind, but it has also darkened your eyes, shrouded your soul, and blinded your spirit, Daniel. I am praying for the light of resurrection power to come upon you. That your spirit, as dead as Lazarus in the tomb after four days is brought to life!

Keep it zipped, man!
I've been praying for that PERFECT mate-for-life to arrive SOON...so don't mess things up, OK?

SHE'S ON THE WAY, MAN!!!

Please don't let her catch you with your trousers off...

And,Mark, avoid those "bearded dykes" alluded to by Daniel2.

I too have faith the right lady will come along. I can tell from your posts, Mark, that you are a KEEPER!

Best snack? M&M's ALWAYS!

NP Sense and Sensibility

quote:

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Originally posted by Mark Olivarez:
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size=1 face=arial>quote:</font><HR size=1>Originally posted by Pete M:
[b]You keep away with your Fish Chips you, or I'll .. I'll ... I'll set Britney Spears on you!!!

He he he. <HR size=1></BLOCKQUOTE>

Set her on me, PLEASE!!!!! Damn I agree with Chris, what happened to the Sex talk????? [/B]

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oN. yM niarb struh. I tonnac kniht sdrawkcab hguone. Keeeeee.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm eseehC.

PN ievoM ehT : enoZ thgiliwT

quote:

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Originally posted by H Rocco:
Well Mark, we could begin again. I have some remarkably unsavory stories about Southeast Asia I could share with you all (and so apparently could the 'chanter, I bet!)

NP: CHICKEN RUN (wonderful score) (no, my charming anecdotes do NOT INVOLVE CHICKENS!)

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<HR size=1></BLOCKQUOTE>

Don't worry Chris I'm the perfect gentleman, I never get caught with my pants down or unzipped.

[Message edited by Mark Olivarez on 02-01-2001]

quote:

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Originally posted by joan hue:
"Please don't let her catch you with your trousers off." Awww, come on, Chris, don't be a killjoy.

And,Mark, avoid those "bearded dykes" alluded to by Daniel2.

I too have faith the right lady will come along. I can tell from your posts, Mark, that you are a KEEPER!

Best snack? M&M's ALWAYS!

NP Sense and Sensibility

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BRITONS WITH BALLS – part XVI

Sir Isaac Newton

Born 1642, Woolsthorp, Lincolnshire, England
Died 1727, London, England

Sir Isaac Newton, English mathematician and physicist, was the greatest single influence on theoretical physics until Albert Einstein. He was most productive during the period 1666-7 (which he called his annus mirabilis), during which he laid the foundations of his future successes in mathematics, optics, dynamics (mechanics), and astronomy. He discovered the binomial theorem, and made contributions to algebra, geometry, and the theory of infinite series, all somewhat overshadowed by his most famous contribution to mathematics--the differential calculus (his 'method of fluxions') for finding rates of change of varying quantities, and his discovery of its relationship with what is now called integration (then 'quadrature'), the problem of finding the area of a figure circumscribed by curved boundaries.

His optical experiments, begun in 1666, led to his discovery that white light is made up of a mixture of coloured rays. He applied his knowledge of optics to the production of the first reflecting telescope in 1668. He became Lucasian Professor of Mathematics at Cambridge in 1669.

In his major treatise, Philosophiae Naturalis Principia Mathematica (1686-7), widely acknowledged as being one of the greatest science books ever written, he gave a mathematical description of the laws of mechanics (Newton's Laws of Motion) and gravitation, and applied this theory to explain planetary and lunar motion. Newton's Law of Gravitation is central to his work on astronomy. It states that the force between any two bodies in the universe is proportional to the product of the masses of the two bodies divided by the square of the distance separating them. He also proved that the gravitational effect of a three-dimensional body such as a planet is equivalent to that of its total mass concentrated at a point at its center. He used his theory to account for the polar flattening of the Earth, the precession of the equinoxes, the revolution of the lunar line of nodes, and also to measure the mass of the Sun and those planets that have moons. He proved that any body moving in space subject to a single central force moves on a conic, such as an ellipse, and he went on to devise a method of calculating cometary orbits.

For most purposes Newtonian mechanics has survived even the 20th-century introduction of relativity theory and quantum mechanics (to both of which theories it stands as a first, but very good, approximation) as a mathematical description of terrestrial and cosmological phenomena.

In 1699 Newton was appointed Master of the Mint, and was responsible for an urgently needed reform of the coinage, and in 1703 was elected President of the Royal Society, whose reputation he greatly increased over the following twenty-four years. Newton interested himself also in alchemy, astrology, and theology, and attempted a biblical chronology. Ever the radical, much like Darwin, Newton was involved in several bitter controversies with the more conservative elements of the scientific community.

You said – ”Then D2 is wrong. Because a Tsunami is not a TIDAL wave, but a SEISMIC wave.”

Maybe tomorrow, or perhaps 10,000 years from now, that island in the Atlantic will collapse into the ocean creating a tidal wave 100 feet high that will devastate the eastern seaboard of the United States.

You said – ”Very bad form sneering at James, Mr. 2…”

Fair comment.

Although my remark was not meant nastily, apologies to James.

You said – ”Daniel2: [content removed so that you may not post another one of your ludicris responses]”

Though you may be genuinely honest in your beliefs, when you talk of wanting ‘no abortions’ and abortion being ‘murder’, you are being extremely naïve in your ostrich-like intransigence. Nobody wants abortions, least of all me, but they are a sad fact of life, whether you choose to accept it or not. Abortions take place for a variety of reasons, one of the most important being the humane termination of a deformed foetus. Don’t get me wrong, there are many great people in the world who suffer great disability (Stephen Hawking for instance), but surely it is right for man, now he has developed the means, to prevent the birth of a child who has no eyes or limbs, or a child doomed to an existence of perpetual pain. Sometimes the cold inevitability of ‘God’, should be challenged by the humanity and artistry of man.

When you cross the street John, do you simply look straight ahead placing one foot in front of the other, believing that God will prevent the traffic from running you over? Do you rely on your faith in God to protect you, come what may?

Of course you don’t. You look from side to side, and wait until the traffic is appropriately placed before beginning the crossing …..in other words you exercise your own judgement, you apply common sense to the matter.

It is the same with abortion. Even Chris believes that, although God created the planet, it is man’s dominion. Thus, mankind must be allowed to exercise his own judgement if he is allowed to progress and improve the lot of humankind. Mankind doesn’t always make the right decision, but it is mankind’s decision to make.

Last year, here in England, much controversy surrounded the birth of Siamese twins. To allow one of the twins to live, surgeons had to terminate the life of the other. If the twins had remained attached, it was extremely likely that both would die within a very few months, having experienced great suffering. However, the staunchly Catholic parents of the twins objected to the ‘murder’ of one of their children, arguing that their childrens’ destiny was in God’s hands, and if both died it would be God’s will.

In a landmark case, the surgeons took the parents to the courtroom, where after lengthy deliberation, it was decided that the surgeons should be allowed to exercise their own humane judgement by terminating the life of one of the twins to allow the other to live.

This is a perfect example of where the practical common sense decisions of man are needed to alter the heartless and dispassionate course of nature (or if you prefer, God).

But this is the kind of difficult decision that your one-dimensional and blinkered philosophy cannot absorb.

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I'm gettin' outta here RIGHT NOW!

we're at 1900+ posts!

2000 is on the horizon.

Chris, regarding that Chicken page. Einstein probably would have said that the Chicken did not necessarily cross the road, but that you could just as well say the road crossed the chicken.

...and how should I drive you nuts? I always thought you already are... *ducksandcovers*

naM suniM ehT -- PN

quote:

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Originally posted by DANIEL2:
being extremely naïve in your ostrich-like intransigence.
But this is the kind of difficult decision that your one-dimensional and blinkered philosophy cannot absorb.

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You seem to have abandoned all pretense and gone on to typing eloquent insults.
Daniel2, I consider with my beliefs more dimensions of any problem than your hopelessly Godless philosophy will allow. It is you, not I, who is imitating the ostrich, placing your head in the sand so that you need not consider the reality of the world you live in. Like the ostrich, your defense is only in your own mind. At some point, you will be run down, and you will be helpless because you cannot accept it. I add my prayers to Chris's in the hope that God will open your eyes before it is too late.

As for the twins: my decision is not to let them die, and likewise not to kill one for the sake of the other. I would have saved them both. The surgeons made the mistake of not trusting God, and the Parents made the mistake of thinking there was nothing they could do. I fully believe that God could have and would have saved those children, both of them, had we let Him.

As for your storm problem: you forget, God is not bound by time. He need not make the storm vanish in an instant; He could make it never have existed in the first place.

Oh, and about Moses: Your quaint little theory explains very little. A volcanic eruption may have created three days of darkness, if that was the method God chose to use. What of the frogs, locusts, plagues upon the cattle, and, of course, the Angel Of Death? A volcanic eruption does not explain them at all. Nor does it cover the Red Sea, as the bible clearly states that "the waters were as a wall to the left of them, and a wall to the right of them, but they passed through on dry land." I give you a B for effort, but you have regrettably failed miserably in your attempt to explain away one of the great biblical mysteries.

Daniel2, I expect that you will continue with your close-minded pontificating, but I suggest you think it through more thoroughly. Your points have more holes than the plot in Dungeons And Dragons.

NP: Emperor’s New Groove, Debney

quote:

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Originally posted by DANIEL2:
Maybe tomorrow, or perhaps 10,000 years from now, that island in the Atlantic will collapse into the ocean creating a tidal wave 100 feet high that will devastate the eastern seaboard of the United States.
And when it does happen, the last thing people will be doing is quibbling over the correct terminology.

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HA! This coming from the Grand High Pedant himself! Wassamatta? Anyone ELSE slips up, you use it as an excuse to invalidate their arguments on the grounds of basic stupidity!

quote:

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Originally posted by DANIEL2:
[B]
...or perhaps 10,000 years from now, that island in the Atlantic will collapse into the ocean creating a tidal wave 100 feet high that will devastate the eastern seaboard of the United States

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Aw crud! The exact date I planned my vaction on too!